# Home should restore children’s sense of control
Sense of control is a basic human need. Unfortunately, School reduces children sense of control. Given that the majority of children’s time is being spent in school, they have to have a different place where their sense of control could be balanced out.
The rest of children’s time are typically being spent at home, which the most sensible place for them to restore their perceived control. Unfortunately, many parents or carers would use Autocratic parenting style which means children won’t have the medium to fulfil their needs.
To restore children’s sense of control, adopt Authoritative parenting style and provide Autotelic family context.
The Self-Driven Child (p. 39)
Teachers can teach, coaches can coach […], but there’s one thing only parents can do: love their kids unconditionally and provide them with a safe base at home. For children who are stressed at school or in other parts of their lives, home should be a safe haven, a place to rest and recover.
The Self-Driven Child (p.48)
Remember, while teachers can teach and coaches can coach (and cut your kid from the team), only you can be the safe base.
The Self-Driven Child (p.110)
The very best thing you can do to help your children develop self-motivation is to give them as much control over their choices as possible, including asking them what is they want to be competent at and in charge of.